Part 2- Importance of knowing & Defining what you want

By Adriana James and Brett Ellis

In Part 1 of this article we discussed the importance of defining (creating boundaries) for your goals and expanded from that into the bigger picture of your life.

We defined our “boundaries” as “indicating the limit or the extent of what we think we are, the extend or the limit of what we can do or have. This could fulfill both functions as limiting, or as defining.“

We had numerous questions emailed to us about this topic – another unexpected proof to the fact that the internet revolution is also spurring people to question and improve their career, relationship and ultimately life skills.

In the future we kindly ask you to use the comments section below the article so we can have an open conversation about this (unless you chose to have your questions remain private) in which case we respect your choice.

As most readers here are aware, in our NLP school we are into possibilities – we are looking for “HOW” to learn about ourselves, about our minds and thought processes based on the presupposition that mind and body are interconnected” and our minds dictate our behaviors.

Thus we can accomplish and achieve far more and far easier things in life if we are in control of our minds or better said our minds’ processes. Unless we strive to control our own mind, somebody else will! And that somebody else may not have your best interest at heart. We have argued that the mind actually dictates how we interpret reality around us, and this, if viewed for the sake of argument it is an essential difference between how we think compared to the main stream society.

Once you’re done reading through this article, you’ll probably be inspired to begin to be aware of your own boundaries and also of those of others which are equally important.

Could setting our boundaries and respecting the boundaries of others set us on a path of experiencing our own lives clearer rather than leaning heavily on the lives of others? Many people are so used to rely on somebody else all the time for their own achievements that when they’re “let down” they experience resentment, frustration and other major negative emotions. Their reliance on outside “help” signifies that in their minds, their own limits – IE boundaries – are considered small, unsure, insecure and this makes them feel perpetually unfulfilled. And here we get into more heavy stuff called “projections”

For our student graduates of the Tad James Co. trainings this subject (projections) will sound familiar since it has been part of our trainings for many years. Nevertheless, it is worth going into an additional discussion and delving deeper into this subject since the issue of Perception is Projection (which is not typically an NLP topic) sheds further light onto the success or failure of your personal goals and achievements.

Incomplete Goal Setting Shapes How We Feel About Ourselves

Have you ever set a goal or decided to do something and later just did it without telling anybody? Probably you did. And most surprisingly you got what you wanted! That was a well formed goal with well defined boundaries – IE limitations – and clarity in how you formulated it, without ambiguity and doubt).

Now let’s expand this just a little further – and get straight to your life. What if the process you apply in setting daily goals also applies to your whole life? Consider this for a moment: what would happen if from within your “personal boundaries” you create and experience your life? Isn’t this interesting to think about?

Well, it seems that this is exactly how it works. And those boundaries define who we are in our lives.

In Part 3 we will show you how can you have much more control over everything in your life.

Stay tuned and until then, be well