10 Limiting Beliefs You Should Give Up to Be Happy
Time Line Therapy® is a set of easy techniques that allow you to let go, and remove completely Negative Emotions and Limiting Beliefs as well as Limiting Decisions from the past.
This seems to be not so important right? Who cares? It happened in the past!
But what you may not have considered is that your past experiences make you who you are today! You act and react to life situations today based on all accumulated experience from the past and this is a good thing. However, your behavior today is not based on your Negative Emotions and Limiting Decisions from the past but from what you learned through those experiences as bad as they were.
So, the assumption here is as follows: it is through the learnings you accumulated in the past that you can keep safe and protected in the present and in the future. It is through these learnings you keep from repeating old mistakes. And finally it is through these learnings that you grow and develop new and beneficial strategies for the present and for the future.
Therefore the role of Negative Emotions from the past is nil. Negative Emotions in the moment are good because they yow you something is wrong in your life, but those Negative Emotions you felt 20 years ago are useless. They were good then, in that moment, but 20 years later they are useless. The learning you gained through that old experience is priceless.
So keep the learning, let go of the old emotions stored on your past memories.
So far so good?
But what about Limiting Beliefs? Beliefs that you may have made in a moment of anger, or frustration, or resentment, or jealousy? Beliefs that your Unconscious Mind still holds in there not knowing how to let them go?
As you read keep in mind Time Line Therapy® which is the method for releasing all of these life limiting beliefs.
Here are some beliefs you could be much better without.
- I am not ________ enough (fill in the blank with “good”, “smart”, pretty”, “capable”, “young”, “old”, “handsome”, “well-off”, “wise”, “knowledgeable”… and the list goes on). This is one of the most common and really damaging beliefs that limit people’s ability to prosper, to find joyful and meaningful relationships, to find solutions to otherwise difficult situations, and so on. This leads obviously to low self-esteem (I wrote a little e-book about that and how damaging it is – see it here.
- I Don’t Want To Feel Emotions This is another common belief. Yes, it is just that – a belief or even a decision. As a result of being hurt, many people decided that it is better if they don’t feel any emotion. They dissociate so badly they become almost like biological androids. The fear of being hurt again is bigger than the experience of emotions. They become emotionally dead. This creates problems everywhere – think relationships …
- I Don’t Know What My Purpose In Life Is I just recently wrote another article touching on this one because I get questions from students asking me what would be their purpose in life. First of all your purpose inside you and therefore it is up to you – and so your purpose is what you make it to be. Only you would know, so you need to find out. There are ways of doing just that…. Find something that interests and drives you in the moment, and if this is not what you’re meant to do for your larger purpose in life you’ll find out soon enough. Then you can change. Maybe the larger purpose is made up of different parts…Remember one thing – only you can figure this one out, but first let go of that belief!
- It Is Dangerous To Be Better Than All The Others. This belief leads to inner conflicts especially if you are a high achiever or if you are the type prone to follow up with your goals. In Australia it is called “the tall poppy” and in the US it is known as the “crab in the bucket” syndrome. Do not dare to stick your head above the average, or you’ll be cut to the level. This belief only helps you to stay in a perpetual unhappiness since it is based on fear, not on a positive uplifting emotion.
- All Others Have It Easier than Me. Oh boy! This one is so bad is silly! If the grass is always greener somewhere else, you’re never going to be happy! Never! Comparing yourself all the time with others is not really constructive. Look at everything you achieved. From the smallest to the biggest. Acknowledge that. With this belief though, no matter what you have, no matter what you are or what you do you’ll never be happy because you’ll never be ______ enough!
- Only after I get ________ I’ll be happy. Happiness is a feeling. You can be happy at any time if you find happiness around you. If you hold this belief in your Unconscious Mind, even with the greatest riches, the best man/woman next to you, the greatest car(s), etc., you’ll never be happy – because you believe you can’t be happy!
- Life is too hard. This belief goes hand in hand with number two above. Very dangerous belief. Life is as hard for you as for everybody else. It may seem to you that some have it easier. They might have it easier financially than you, but if you were to look closely you might find a lot of trouble somewhere else in their life. They might have it easier in relationships, but how is their health? You get the idea. Life is hard – so what? Life is worth living. Give up the “hard” belief, and you’ll see that all difficulties become solvable. You cannot find any solutions with this belief, because you don’t even try.
- My _______Are To Blame for Everything That’s Happening to Me Now. Insert here “past”, “father/mother”, “bother/sister”, “school”, “economy”, “background”, “friends”, “ex boy/girlfriend”, “boss”, “lover”, etc.) Hmmm…. How much can you do about them? If they hurt you, or did not pay attention to you, or even worse, in some cases abused you, who’s suffering now? They or you? Of course you can suffer for the rest of your life, and be an unfortunate victim, but guess what? They don’t care. They did not care then, and they don’t care now! So, only if you let go of the blame game, you can be free. I know – easier said than done. You need some Time Line Therapy® intervention to be free of this one, but we saw it happening so often in our NLP trainings… it is really common. I now I am asking you to trust me on this one because you were so badly bruised and hurt you cannot imagine even being free of this one. But I have experienced it myself and I have seen it in every training where I teach many people how to liberate themselves from their hurtful past. But that requires you changing that belief and taking responsibility for your present and future happiness.
- Relationships Are Painful – I’m Burned Out. I Don’t Want A Relationship Anymore. This is an extremely un-useful belief. You only cut yourself from experiencing one of the most positive feelings – Love. Love doesn’t hurt, expectations do. They say that if you give up on love you give up on life. Learn from your past relationships – are you repeating the same pattern? Then there is surely something for you to get so you don’t do it anymore. But the belief itself won’t make that happen – and it won’t keep you safe. Remember you need to experience darkness in order to find the light.
- I Can’t Be Happy Unless I’m In A Relationship. This is the opposite of number 9 and leads to mistake after mistake. With this beliefs usually people jump in relationships based on emotional responses only without reasoning first whether it is the right thing to do and thus they repeat over and over again the same pattern. This is just a belief that makes you appear and even be clingy. Yes you can be happy on your own – how many people do you know who are deeply unhappy in relationships? Happiness is up to you not up to another individual. With a good supportive group of friends or family members you can be happy. And when you give up the need, the “must have” … usually you find what you’re looking for.
Until next time, be well.